It’s my pleasure to share a loving mother’s message.
-Francisco Garcia
Our precious little children. Heaven help me, as my little one grew, I could not believe how many times I would stop and remember those early days, when we celebrated giggles, burps and messy little faces. During those first few years it felt like each day brought something new and different for us to learn and understand about each other. Things like the first tooth, learning to talk and to walk were such big moments for us. I remember which were the favorite books we’d read and the bedtime ritual with her favorite blanket and fuzzy bunny. The first day of school left us both in tears. These steps, some smaller than others reflect fleeting moments of her childhood where together we tackled the challenges of math and soccer practice.
High school started and the game changes – big time. Over time, my sweet daughter started lying to us, stealing from our house, dating boys she met online and nothing my husband and I could say had any impact. We tried everything we knew, but the bottom line was these were her choices, and her life. She made reckless choices and although it was a struggle, thankfully she finished high school. Shortly after graduation, she moved out. This isn’t the life we hoped for her, but this was her life. These were hard moments, as a family we struggled with how to talk to each other, feelings were like a raw nerve, exposed and tender. Her visits home grew further apart and eventually stopped altogether. I’d get the occasional phone call, but these too grew further and further apart.
Then I get a call she’d like to meet me for lunch. When she walks into the restaurant I see that she is very much pregnant. A sea of emotion hits me all at once – like a title wave. Numb and at a loss for words I listen as she unfolds the past year of her life and the things that lead up to this moment. She realized that her friends were more like people you just party with and not true friends. None of them were there when things got really tough. She told me the guy she was with got pretty angry when she became pregnant and wanted nothing to do with having a baby. My heart broke as I listened to her tell me how alone and isolated she felt.
She began to tell me about a program for new moms, she was participating in. It was free, and her doctor said it was a great program for young women having their first baby. A nurse would meet with her and talk about the many things happening with her and the baby during pregnancy and what she needed to do in preparation for the baby’s arrival. At first she said it was really hard, so much was changing in her life, she was scared and had so many questions. Her nurse met with her every week, and even responds to text messages in between visits. She realized she had some pretty big life choices to consider for herself and the baby.
Today, she said, was one of them. She knew she had made some bad choices, said and did some pretty awful things that damaged our relationship. Her nurse encouraged her to think about her circle of support and to consider what she could do to repair her relationship with us.
Sitting across from this young and courageous woman who is working to be a better person and striving to learn how to be a good mom, I couldn’t be prouder. We have work ahead, certainly, as we mend past hurts and prepare for this new member of our family. Today she took a big step for herself and her baby. I could see how much my daughter has grown up, however, I can also see that darling little girl with her favorite blanket and fuzzy bunny and I am happy for her. Soon she will be forging these same treasured memories with her baby. Thanks to the nurse with the New Moms program, my brave little girl is going to be the best mom she can be. If you are a new mom, or know someone who is going to be, give them a call. Maybe they can help you too 724-9721.
